Houndson Doggington’s life is still pretty rough. His new owner, Molly, doesn’t make enough to get dog treats, so he lives on a strict diet of kibble, and only kibble. In a panic, he went to a casino to see if he could win himself a few biscuits. After a week or two, he was addicted, and spent every spare moment at the casino.
Houndson, what are you going to do about this gambling problem of yours?
For the last time, it’s not a problem if you’re great at it! I’m on a huge streak, why should I stop now? I mean, don’t you see this little belly I’ve got goin’ on here? How do you think I rounded that out? Kibble? I mean, come on.
Do you really not understand that casinos make their money when you lose yours? Eventually, you’re going to stop winning.
No I won’t! I’m great! Didn’t you see the latest study? Dogs can key into human emotions and feelings. I can tell when someone is over in blackjack, and I can practically see the other side of the cards in poker. Humans are stupid. Their cards might as well be projected onto their faces.
Well thanks…I hope you realize that no good can come of this. You dogs may be able to tell what we’re feeling, but nothing lasts forever.
~ One Week Later ~
So how’s bankruptcy?
Oh shut up.